Tuesday, June 23, 2009

why is there only a teaspoon when i want a cup?

i'm a giver...i dont even know if its by nature...i think its more by accidental bad breeding...the women in my family on both sides....are taught to give not take... we give first eat last up first sleep last take nothing give all ask for nothing wish for everything before we can be deemed real women i am not allowed to crack...whatever that means it goes back to my friend who says i never cry.... i remember being a small girl....kneeling down on the floor and getting a huge carpenters staple in my knee. i remember taking a big breath and pulling it out and watch the blood reel down my leg...and never telling anyone...never asking for a bandaid...taking care of it all myself. i will be 36 years old soon and i still dont know how to ask for a bandaid...for you to help me...for you to comfort me.

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